Can one wear cargo pants in public?
If you care enough to really seriously ask that question, then the answer is a most definite NO. Cargo pants are a juvenile, baggy, and completely unflattering waste of cotton. Get rid of them. Get a backpack or a messenger bag to hold your cellphone, and stop taxing your waist and your back with all the crap you stuff into those god-awful pockets.
There are however, two situations in which wearing cargo pants is especially egregious:
1) You are over 30 years old.
You're not young any more. Get over it. To all the thirty-year-olds still wearing cargo pants: I'd like to introduce you to a store known as Banana Republic. Get thee to one post haste. There, you can get a good wardrobe (which as a 30-something you should be able to afford), and get yourself some pants that don't indicate you still wish you were 20. They'll even extend you a line of credit to get pants (the Banana Republic Card)! Capitalism is sending you a message, fogeys. Listen.
2) You are wearing a shirt and tie.
I don't know what possessed the otherwise adorable young man I saw on the El this afternoon to wear this horrible combo of shirt, tie and cargo pants, but this method of ruining an otherwise beautiful and classic combination constitutes a fashion crime against humanity. We're convening the court, people...
That is all.
For the record: My computer has died (again), and is traveling to California for repairs tomorrow. Because of this and other factors, blogging may be light.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
On Straight Men and Cargo Pants
Posted by Nick at Tuesday, February 08, 2005
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