Sunday, May 04, 2008

I'm not picky

I would like to find an apartment with the following traits:

1) A dishwasher.
2) A dish washer (searching for both on Craigslist expands the set of possible apartments).
3) Near a train that might actually be of use (i.e. not the M or G).
4) Enough room for two people.
5) By #4 I mean nothing "cozy," nothing "perfect for a student," and most of all, nothing that involves "five young professionals looking for a roommate" who for whatever reason decide to list their available room on Craigslist as if it were a free-standing one bedroom. To those who list their $1200/month one-bedrooms in the West Village, you're not fooling anyone.
6) In a neighborhood where people tend not to get shot. My old block in Brooklyn had a shooting or two, and Hyde Park, where to begin? So, somewhere gentrified enough that shootings, say, are rare enough that they make it to the news.
7) The need to live near-ish to NYU eliminates the Bronx and Staten Island from the search; as #3 made clear, all of Brooklyn, Queens, and (as if) Manhattan are fair game, assuming train reasonableness.

Other people do care about the following. I do not:

1) Near a park.
2) Exposed brick.
3) Hardwood floors.
4) Good schools in the area.
5) On-site parking.
6) Exciting nightlife nearby.
7) A community of recent college grads. I'm fine with a community of recent immigrants, recent retirees, recent Chabad devotees, anything but recent purchasers of handguns or explosives. In terms of neighbors, almost anything goes.

6 comments:

Petey said...

Well, if you're willing to forsake condition #7, you might want to consider Elkhart, Indiana. It's right on Amtrak's Chicago/NYC line, which is a useful train for getting to NYU. So condition #3 is met.

And you'd really prefer a dishwasher to hardwood floors? Abysmal priorities, those.

Finally, considering that you didn't list "low price" as one of your desirable traits, I'd advise finding a nice 4000 sq ft loft in SoHo. That should meet all seven conditions.

(Assuming "low price" actually is a priority, Chinatown is the answer to your problems, but somehow I'm not sure that's what you're looking for. If quality of life doesn't matter, go for Queens instead.)

Phoebe said...

I couldn't list "low price" as a requirement because, as the Petite Abeille episode illustrates, everyone's got a different idea of what that means.

I've actually been to Elkhart, Indiana. Think I'll go with Queens.

Petey said...

One additional condition should be to find an apartment that gets HBO reception. Sex and the City is better that way.

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I've never understood why white folk on a budget don't consider Chinatown. You've got to deal with crowded sidewalks, and you've got to do some legwork finding an indigenous broker rather than going through Craigslist, but the deals can be pretty amazing.

There's no crime, it's perfectly located, the neighborhood smells wonderful, and your friends and associates will think you far hipper than you actually are.

Phoebe said...

In my experience "white folk on a budget" do consider Chinatown.

Scott Lemieux said...

Dishwashers are critical.

I actually thought Astoria was really nice, and if you're on the N train side the commute to NYU is decent...

Phoebe said...

Astoria might well be the winner. If Craigslist is to be believed, Astoria's teeming with dishwashers.