Dylan writes:
...I do not expect women to ignore my own flaws. My emotional hangups on hopeless causes aside, that's the biggest reason I rarely ask anyone out. It's not even that I don't think they'd go out with me; I don't think they should go out with me. If I found some hot girl who was happy with a guy who needs to lose 30+ pounds before he'll think he looks good, I would nevertheless keep her at a distance until I was in shape.
It seems the Slithery D is adhering to the policy I've advocated on this blog: Men care how women look, women care how men look, so women should insist upon men looking good. The problem, though, is that plenty women probably do ignore whatever flaws it is Dylan is referring to (having never seen him, I'll just take his word for what he sees these flaws to be). Women today are, every day of the week, ignoring men's physical flaws, while striving to fix their own. I find it admirable that Dylan matches his superficiality (but is caring how one's partner looks superficial, or a form of self-respect? Caring, I should add, does not have to mean caring that s/he be conventionally attractive, but just physically attractive by the given individual's framework...) with an acknowledgement that women have an equal right to be superficial. But "emotional hangups" and obsession with one's perceived flaws are never any fun for anyone, male or female, so while I'm happy to see that Dylan is a primping-feminist, I still find his post a bit disheartening.
Sunday, January 30, 2005
The Slithery feminist?
Posted by Phoebe Maltz Bovy at Sunday, January 30, 2005
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