Miss Self-Important (see what I did there?), others interested in Styles journalism, you may want to bookmark this one.
It has, oh, everything. (I now see Gawker is already on the case, but it's too easy of a target for them.) We've got:
-An Upper East Sider who thinks going downtown is like visiting Milan, which I sure know is how I felt commuting from the UES to high school at the edge of Tribeca. A Northern Italian vacation every day. (Actually, the gym teacher who almost failed me second term senior year had a last name that's also that of a different Northern Italian city, so, perhaps.)
-Another UESer, on dining out downtown: "'You can go out to dinner and you don’t have to be dressed.'” Indeed, it's so bohemian that one can go to restaurants in the nude.
-Another UESer, on why she had to make that pioneering trek:
For Suzanne Cochran and her husband, Robert, a founder of the Build America Mutual Assurance Company, it was a downtown soiree some years ago that persuaded them to buy a pied-à-terre in TriBeCa. “We were at a friend’s party,” Ms. Cochran recalled. “She is a very downtown girl, and it was all my favorite kind of people: artists — cool, hip people. And we were the only ones who lived on the Upper East Side.”-A whole bunch of uptown residents buying what they call a "pied-à-terre" downtown, troubling both because they think downtown is another city (or country?) and because their little hubs in the Village or whatever are massively out-of-reach to those trying to live in that area full-time. (Beware the pitchfork-wielding NYU grad students.)
-A weird sort of reinforcement of the ridiculous belief many downtown still share, that they're somehow not a bunch of stuffy finance types and trustafarians, even though that's what "downtown" has been for a good long while now, with the exception of the NYU profs in subsidized housing and the rent-controlled stragglers. But the mere existence of an even-stuffier set, for whom south of 59th Street is an adventure, makes them scrappy by default. And there's nothing a "downtown" finance type living in an amenity-filled building-and-area seems to enjoy more than being told he's actually a gentrifying hipster. According to a real-estate developer, downtown “'is much more diverse, it isn’t all fund managers, but artists, literary people, then some Wall Street sprinkled in.'” I kind of think dude's got the proportions wrong. But intentionally so - this is, it seems, what sells.
-There's a cheeky (correct use of British English?) reference to the One Percent.
-There's this bit:
“You are seeing people ask themselves: Do I have an affair, get a divorce or get a downtown apartment?” said Michele Kleier, the president and chairwoman of Kleier Residential, a brokerage with a large uptown clientele. “It has become a very sexy thing to do, especially for those people living a sedate Park Avenue lifestyle.”-All the more so, this:
Ms. Kleier recently represented two Upper East Side families who are warehousing downtown apartments for their children. One couple bought two two-bedroom apartments for their high school-age children in Battery Park City; the other bought a three-bedroom for their son at 150 Charles Street in the West Village, which won’t be completed until 2015. Asking prices there are averaging nearly $4,000 a square foot. “By that time he will be in college, so he can live there if he’s in New York or they can rent it out,” Ms. Kleier said.No, readers, you weren't "warehoused" a lower Manhattan apartment. It's fine, me neither. Despite that massive life obstacle, we shall march on.