Today I learned many things:

1) Hasids can (or, at least, do) wear Doc Martens.

2) I do not get the least bit nervous when it is announced that there is "an investigation at Borough Hall." (But what, exactly, was going on? The alternate route I improvised took forever...)

3) I can eat an entire falafel platter--with hummus, tahini, tabouli, Israeli salad, and zatar pita--in about three seconds.

4) My apartment is out of toilet paper, hand soap, and vodka.

5) Japanese green tea from Oren's on 71st is surprisingly terrible. But purchasing this meant a stamp on the card, and only 11 beverages later, I will get a free mocha, at which point I will brag to everyone at work about my free mocha, at which point I will, if farcical history repeats itself unchanged, spill some of said mocha on an unfortunate part of a pale pink shirt.