Sephorism

Do you know when makeup is fun? When you're 11 and you've only just discovered blue eyeshadow. You know when it's less fun? When you're in grad school and are using the stuff to look like you weren't up all hours writing papers and grading exams. So, to repeat, we should let our children roam free amongst cosmetics. To the many commentators at Jezebel who are convinced that their own 'real' childhoods playing sports in the mud were somehow morally superior, I remind you that valuing physical fitness and nature over femininity, artifice, and materialism is kind of, well, fascist.

To preempt the furious comments from those who hate makeup and genocide, my point is not that valuing the outdoors makes you a Nazi, but that there's nothing inherently innocent about either the pro- or anti-lipgloss position. But I'm no relativist, and if I had to pick, the great outdoors, not the great Sephora, is the root of all evil.