Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Another WWPD contest

Let us say there was an apartment. And directly above this apartment, there was another apartment. And let's say that, in the downstairs apartment, at all hours, sounds would emanate from the upstairs one. Sounds of stomping, banging, and moving furniture. Morning through the night. Continuous noise of the sort just mentioned, and heard in all rooms of the downstairs apartment at any given time. What's going on upstairs?

1) An orphanage: Katherine's theory is consistent with the fact that there are children we suspect may live in this apartment, and with the moving furniture sounds, which may well be the movement of so many small beds across a floor.

2) A horse: Also Katherine's theory, consistent with the louder-than-human stomping and the fact that an iTunes playlist in this building is "horsemusic" or something like that.

3) A petting zoo: Consistent with the varied sounds, the continuous noise, and the fact that there seem to be both children and animals.

4) A chest of drawers filled, ala Seinfeld, with either cigar-making Dominicans or Japanese tourists (theory of anonymous "friend of WWPD"): Thus the moving furniture, and the many, many footsteps.

5) Something else, i.e., fill in the blank. Here's the blank: ____________

The winner of this contest receives a horse, an orphan, a baby goat, or a foreign national.

5 comments:

  1. Either a speed freak or someone lifting weights/working out.

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  2. Well it's clearly not a University of Chicago graduate.

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  3. "Manic interior designer" appeals to me as an answer, what with my "Designing Women" fixation.... perhaps it's a whole TEAM of manic interior designers, ala Sugarbakers, except rather than grappling with their daily lives, these folks upstairs actually, you know, decorate interiors.

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  4. Santa's workshop, quite obviously. Global warming has done a number on the arctic, and Brooklyn offered tax credits for them to relocate. Sweatshops of all kinds are often located in residential buildings in New York.

    The elves are foreign nationals, mostly from Iceland.

    What you think is a horse is actually a reindeer. And, of course, all Icelandic elves sleep in chests of drawers.

    After you confirm my prescience by sneaking upstairs to peek, I'd like one of the elves as my prize.

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