tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post4545003867430445221..comments2024-03-12T22:31:46.500-04:00Comments on What Would Phoebe Do?: A real head-turner UPDATEDPhoebe Maltz Bovyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17996039330841139883noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post-74993710244295769752011-01-04T22:56:48.089-05:002011-01-04T22:56:48.089-05:00Are you sure that what you care most about in a pa...Are you sure that what you care most about in a partner is not a <i>bravolebrity</i>?tofast4yall2011http://indietits.com/2006/02/blogs-lol.htmlnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post-9657809045074352592010-12-31T11:57:32.046-05:002010-12-31T11:57:32.046-05:00M.S.
Re: men exaggerating their heights, being n...M.S. <br /><br />Re: men exaggerating their heights, being neurotic about being short, it makes sense they'd do so because height is something women are expected to value. Even women who don't value it are presumed to be preoccupied with it, making it so that women who couldn't care less end up with taller guys just to avoid the drama. (Seems like "height" could be a stand-in for something else!)<br /><br />PG,<br /><br />I've also gotten the remarks that every short woman gets for being with a much taller man. But maybe twice? I've had more experience of being told that I ought to have been somehow reserved for a theoretical Jewish man, and that it's unfair to Theoretical Jewish Man that I'm not available to him. Not that I'm some great catch, but that there are so few Jews, Need Jewish Babies, and all that.Phoebe Maltz Bovyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17996039330841139883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post-46499160012531808142010-12-31T01:15:32.977-05:002010-12-31T01:15:32.977-05:00I'm 5'2 3/4" and discriminate height-...I'm 5'2 3/4" and discriminate height-wise only against guys who are shorter than I am for the reason M.S. states, i.e. they tend to be excessively self-conscious about their lack of height. But supposedly once they're past junior high, many guys of average height find taller women almost hypnotically attractive (something like that scene with Mag in the novella "Breakfast at Tiffany's").<br /><br />The average-height guys I know don't seem to be particularly anxious about their height. They'd sorta like to be taller, but it doesn't come up any more often than *my* desire to be taller.<br /><br />One thing I have experienced, however, is tall women not-totally-joking that they are irked by my having married a 6'+ guy because there aren't enough of them available. There's also a little of this with single women older than I making comments about my being with someone several years older and thus removing him from their field of eligibles. I don't have this feeling myself with respect to any kind of man, but then again it's a lot more socially unacceptable for me to "joke" to a non-Indian girl with a desirable Indian guy that she has somehow stolen him from his rightful partners, than it is for such comments to be made on the bases of height, age, etc.PGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09381347581328622706noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post-60113903141630296272010-12-30T23:03:23.963-05:002010-12-30T23:03:23.963-05:00"Because in a crowd, from a distance, in an a..."Because in a crowd, from a distance, in an age of gender-neutral dress, in a season of overcoats, it's simply more likely that the person seen from the corner of one's eye is of one's preferred gender if that person is in the 6'-and-up range than if we're talking 5'6"" <br /><br />I don't know about that, personally I've learned to avoid shorter dudes because of their complexes. I've dated a number of guys that are the same height or a few inches shorter than me. Without fail they've all claimed that I'm only taller than them because of heels (which, yes, but also in flats). Or just add a few inches to their reported height. Just saying, there are some of us who aren't discriminating on height or even drawn to height so much as "oh great, another likelihood that someone cannot stand my Amazonian status". After all, if I can crane over a crowd, the short ones stick out as much as the tall ones. Obviously can't speak for the short to average. <br /><br />And yes, while it's also acceptable, to ladies, man does "I'm really 6 foot!" when it's just a touch obvious they're not, get old. <br /><br />As for online dating, wasn't there one of those incredibly statistically relevant OkCupid polls finding an average of 2" that guys added to their online height?M.S.https://www.blogger.com/profile/16438817799682053974noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post-1807953969678809762010-12-30T20:13:27.297-05:002010-12-30T20:13:27.297-05:00Interestingly, how much a man cares about face ver...Interestingly, how much a man cares about face versus body depends on how long he thinks the relationship is going to last. Long term, men care more about her face, short term, they care more about her body. Study to not be able to cite the study that backs this up.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post-39393379833678999422010-12-30T17:41:11.782-05:002010-12-30T17:41:11.782-05:00To answer this would require a more thorough inves...To answer this would require a more thorough investigation into how what people put on dating websites relates to what they'd find most attractive in a more natural setting. But I'll give it a shot.<br /><br />The only social pressure exerted on women in terms of caring about men's looks is that the man be tall. This, in turn, is why height is the only aspect of a man's appearance a woman can care about without seeming like Madonna on a quest for the next boy-toy. But even women who don't care about height in terms of what does it for them physically might well care about the social approval a tall mate confers. I suspect, for various reasons that could make this comment too long, that the criteria entered on a relationship-oriented dating website would be ones tilted more towards attractiveness-for-others.Phoebe Maltz Bovyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17996039330841139883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7146512.post-30653292882956422382010-12-30T17:06:32.342-05:002010-12-30T17:06:32.342-05:00I don't think this seen-in-a-crowd thing about...I don't think this seen-in-a-crowd thing about tall men explains much. If this was the case, the fanatical height filtering of many women would be less pronounced in personal ads. But it only takes a few clicks in match.com to assemble a small army of women 5'4" and shorter who insist on 6' men.<br /><br />I've still yet to see a good comprehensive explanation of this height preference.<br /><br />One thing I have noticed - women list 6' as their Mandatory Minimum Height much more than they list 5'11" or 6'1". Something about the nice round number? What happens under the metric system?Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13097613583141006228noreply@blogger.com